The Most Ridiculous Company on the Planet

Ad found on Jobstreet:

Ringmaster's note: Daisy Duck, beloved niece, I got the perfect job for you!



STOP! READ! We are a young and vibrant 20 person group (average age is 24) who likes to work the graveyard shift. We promote an open office atmosphere, where you can listen to music, talk to your colleagues and eat out at 2:00 in the morning. We are NOT a call center. If this is not for you, please do not apply!

Marketing Executive Assistant
(National Capital Reg)



Responsibilities:

* Assist the VP of marketing
* Admin work
* Accept office calls/ client calls
* Pose as a model for the youtube videos of products

Requirements:

* Female 18-30 yrs old
* Candidate must possess at least a Bachelor's/College Degree , Post Graduate Diploma / Master's Degree, Professional License (Passed Board/Bar/Professional License Exam), Post Graduate Diploma / Master's Degree, Marketing, Business Studies/Administration/Management, Mass Communications, Advertising/Media, Commerce or equivalent.
* Required skill(s): Good communication skills, Pleasing personality, Good looking (for youtube demo`s), Computer literate.
* Required language(s): English
* Fresh graduates/Entry level applicants are encouraged to apply.
* Full-Time positions available.

[of course you get a master's and doctoral degree to become a youtube model!]

On another note, the company is also looking for a "Marketing Associate for Public Relations" and their requirements are just as great as the previous posting!

Responsibilities:

• Successful applicants would be handling Marketing work, call outs and keeping good relations with current and potential clients. We are a US based company and this is not a call center work. We hire Good People not just good resumes.

Requirements:

• Must have great spoken English, light accent is ok, however you must be CLEAR on the phone. A phone interview will be conducted to determine eligibility.
• Excellent communication and interpersonal skills written and oral, self-motivated, can multi-task and able to act under pressure.

I'm seriously tempted to apply. :)

A Message from the Ring Master

Ladies and Gentleman, Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals , Transgenders, and Transvestites, People and animals of all shapes, sizes and species, it is with great and orgasmic pleasure that I present to you Barnum & Scrooge! The Greatest Blog on Earth!

How can I claim it so? Well… can you name anyone else who claims the name? WELL FUCK THEM! My name is Mister Scrooge and I don’t give a rat’s ass about what you think! If you don’t like my bitching then get far away before I hit you with my steel cane, good for nothing low-life! And don’t even try to solicit money from me, for your “bake sales” or for the “Ms. Blogalandia Beauty Pageant” coz I DON’T GIVE MONEY! I like money… my precious.

Enjoy the show or I’ll make sure you join dear old Mr. Barnum swimming with the fishies.

That is all.

Mister Scrooge